New Years Resolutions

Resolutions. The thing which everyone makes and nobody keeps. Though in all honesty, how many people do you know that make resolutions they intend to keep? Everyone says they will lose 10 pounds or read through the whole Bible or make a better effort to be organized or something equally dull. In reality, though these may all be honorable endeavors are they really things people want to do? There are enough things in our lives that we feel compelled to do shouldn’t resolutions be about things you genuinely want to do? Those things that make you happy that always seem to get pushed aside under the mountain of other obligations. So this year we’re making our resolutions together and we’ve decided to share them with you both as inspiration for your own resolutions and as a way of remembering and holding ourselves accountable. Because sometimes enjoying life is hard work. ^ ^

Sabrael’s Resolutions

Resolution the first: Limit the number of planned projects. More often than not I get ideas for projects left and right, and almost immediately they all go into planning phase and end up bottle necking projects I already had set-up, meaning I end up getting nothing done. I need to figure out a system for myself on how to efficiently streamline the idea process on my projects. And so the rules of this resolution are as follows: If I get an idea for a projects I am going to write it down with a few notes on what I had in mind when it came to me. It’ll stay there until another project is out of planning and a project spot becomes available. I will keep my number of planned projects to 4, and I must never have more than this, but I can have fewer than this if I find that one project is a big enough work load to keep me busy.

Resolution the second: Learn to archive old notes and ideas instead of deleting them. I find that I have old ideas and notes floating around in various places and more often than not I end up erasing them, and making a document that eventually also gets erased, only to find that sometime later I want those notes back and neither my document nor my original source are available. I need to realize that redundancy isn’t always a bad thing. And so the rules of this resolution are as follows: Whenever I stumble across notes or documentation of something that I am not working on, and don’t see myself working on soon, I will make redundant backups just in case. One will be on GoogleDocs, another on my personal website as a simple text file, and the last two will be files on both my computer and my private server’s DataSpace. If I have the opportunity, I will also print a hard copy and stash that away in an accordion file, but that one might not be very often.

Resolution the third: Maintain a self schedule and stick to it. I am very prone to distractions. And sadly it isn’t as simple as getting caught up in browsing the web or clicking that lovable StumbleUpon button. No, my distractions involve finding a new site and exploring it, or getting a new game with potential for fictional work, or the worse one yet, going headfirst into a project and ignoring everything else that needs to be done. I want to divide my time up into my various projects and obsessions, even if it means I only get a small amount time with each one, I’d like to see progress all around. And so the rules of this resolution are as follows: In any given week, I will spend at the very least 3 hours on any one project or hobby. I can spend more time on them, but only after each item has been given its allotment.

Sorcha’s Resolutions

The First Resolution: The 12 Goals. I know I’ve talked occasionally on this blog about how over the past few years I’ve gone through some real highs and lows with my depression. It shut me down, essentially. I passed up some great opportunities and let a lot of good people fall through my fingers. I know that those are things I won’t ever be able to get back but I can make a conscious decision not to let it happen again. So every month I’m going to make myself a goal. It’s going to be something I want to do, learn, see, visit, buy, explore, etc and I’m going to make it happen. It can be done by myself or with others but I’m not going to let anything stop me from completing my goals and trying something new. The rules dictate that the goal must be chosen by the first of the month to keep me from BSing something at the last minute. The goals don’t necessarily have to be something I haven’t done before but they at least have to be done in a new way. They also have to be something I enjoy doing but something that would be at least slightly challenging to complete.

The Second Resolution: Write Daily. Over the summer I was introduced to a website I absolutely love called 750words. It’s a journaling website where the goal is to write 750 words (about 2-3 pages) a day. At the end of every entry it makes charts and graphs of your mood, concerns, and content which you can share with others but all of your entries themselves are entirely private. I started off really strong on 750words, making it to an 80 day streak before technical difficulties broke my record. I got very discouraged by this and kept trying to pick it up again but something always distracted me from it. I got lazy, copying and pasting text to make the goal and really that’s entirely against the point. Sab and I are planning to set up a prompt system to help me keep on track. The rules dictate that all content submitted to 750words but be written that day. It doesn’t have to be creative writing specifically but that is what is preferred and, along with personal journaling, should make up the biggest percentage of articles. Homework cannot be copied and pasted for filler content. At least one prompt should be used per week and at least two entries should be journal.

The Third Resolution: Choose Active Entertainment Over Passive. Netflix and YouTube, like most things, are some of my greatest joys and biggest distractions. I have something playing on my computer almost constantly, even when I’m not really paying attention. Just to give you an idea, I finished watching five seasons of Buffy in about two months. Two months that were interspersed with school and work no less. I’m not saying that I’m going to give up my show addictions but I need to keep a better eye on it. I also need to keep my mindless internet stumbling to a minimum. If I’m not working or playing with something specific I should find something else to do. I need to make it a point to read more books, work on more of my crafts, go to new museum exhibitions, play games with my friends. It’s time to take back control over my brain again. The rules dictate that I should limit my online video watching to around 10 hours per week. Also if I realize that I’m just aimlessly wandering the internet I should cut myself off after an hour. School and writing work should take priority but after that’s finished I need to find something else to keep my mind busy.

And there you have it, our resolutions. Simple but progressive. It goes to show that with a little help from a loving partner, you can help enforce your resolutions on yourself. Of course, it helps if these resolutions are reasonable, as opposed to dramatic and over the top. Some people might say that relying on someone to help you with a resolution you made to yourself, a challenge you chose to take on, is a sign of weakness, or a lack of resolve. Hardly, if you can’t rely on the person you love in times of need, then who can you rely on? So until next time, promise to format your flash drives, and have a Happy and Safe New Years.

P.S. To all our readers out there, thank you for reading! We started in October, and this ends our 3rd Month of Love 2.0. Feel free to post your comments and questions here, or at our new e-mail addresses linked below in our profiles. Also, I’d like to point out our new web address at http://digitalromance.co.cc. It is official, we are here for a while still. Be sure to update your bookmarks and take care.

Holiday Hiatus

Yes, this post is filler and it is two days late but unfortunately that's not the only disappointment coming from us this holiday season. Sorry about that! Due to a mind melting finals week, a change of address, and typical holiday insanity, Love 2.0 will be taking a short, but well deserved, break. Part of this is for our own mental health and part of it is so that we can better prepare for the new year and set up some new things for you, our readers.

We've decided that the format of the joint Wednesday posts fits our schedules and our interests more so you're probably going to be seeing a lot more of them, we've planned for two per month. Though we will still continue with the Monday/Friday schedule as well. We're hoping to be able to do some more planning on the Wednesday posts to make them more interesting and involved for you.

Also as a little holiday bonus I've created a coupon code for you guys to use in my Etsy shop. Just visit Nerdette Romance and before your purchase your item type DIGITALROMANCE in the coupon code box to get 15% off your purchase. I can't guarantee your items will get to you by Christmas but I will keep this code up for a year so you have until next December to use it.

Happy Holidays, thanks so much for your patience, and look out for our next post after December 31st! Don't forget to buy your laptop a new holiday sweater and have a great end to 2010!

PS - Sab, I absolutely loved your article on Monday and I feel bad that something so beautiful and that made me smile so big only gets followed by a filler. I promise my next ones will be better. ^ ^ I love you so much, hope you have a great Christmas, and I'll see you back here soon. Muah!

Day to Day: Episode 1

On occasion, a day is interesting, a week can be notable and a month can be quite memorable. I've noticed that Sorcha and I tend to have a certain mindset when we come to our laptops. We have a topic in mind and we write on it. Now I don't mind this system of a sort of column, but on occasion I'd like to talk about my day, and how it relates to our topic here of romance. So today's article is less of a topical column and more of a simple journal from your author.

Today was a quite hectic day. It started early when my love called me on her way to a long day at work. It isn't uncommon for us to exchange texts in the morning, her while off to school, and me in gaps of sleep. But I knew she had a long day ahead of her. I actually got out of bed some time later and spent my morning rambling my thoughts off to an offline Sorcha. I know GTalk would deliver my messages when she got a chance to sign on, and I didn't need instant response, I just needed to clear my head, and even offline, my love performed that role so well. I felt less mentally cluttered and refreshed right away. And when she signed on she even sparked inquiries about my thoughts, helping me refine them. It's one of the aspects I fell in love with, the way she can ask just the right questions.

I ended up headed to a mall to help my roommate Christmas shop, and while I texted while there, I was reminded of her in a variety of ways, some sillier than most. The most obvious in the item I bought as her Christmas gift. While at a jewelry shop I was going to see if I qualified for credit to get a ring, necklace and earring set. Sadly I had forgotten my wallet at home, and so I couldn't even apply. I was going to get Aquamarine, her birthstone, but when I saw May, the Emeralds reminded me of her more. She loves green, and more importantly, it reminded me of Ireland, which always makes me think of her. While passing by the food court, I saw a Asian woman sitting and talking on her cell phone, and she was very small and her feet couldn't touch the ground and it was cute how she was just kicking them. And for those who don't know, my Sorcha is very small, and sometimes needs a pillow to sit at her parents kitchen table. It just reminded me of her. We walked by a shop with a gelatto display, and they had it all big and decorated, and Amaretto flavor was all there, and I know how much she loves it. Then we headed to The Disney Store and I saw a cute Alice in Wonderland Journal that had pink pages, and it made me think of her. One of the kiosks was selling those hugable animal pillows, and the one the guy handed me to 'test' was one I really wanted to buy: an adorable honeybee with pudgy wings.

Now, it isn't new to have Sorcha on my mind all day, it's common. But aside from simply thinking of her, it felt nice to be reminded of the things I associate to her. Alice in Wonderland Journals, Amaretto Gellato, Dangling Feet, Ireland, Emeralds, and of course Honeybee Pillows. I wish I had the money for the things I could have sent her. I would gladly send her everything that reminded me of her if I could. And while I'm not saying love is buying things and spending money, love is seeing the one you love in those things, and wanting them, just because they make you smile, even if it isn't as much as that special person does. That is love, wanting to surround yourself in memories and thoughts of them. So until next time, buy your desktop some pretty icons, and have a great week.

P.S. I loved your article my dear. And I love being there for you. Nothing makes me smile more than seeing you smile. I would move mountains and steal stars if it pleased you. You’ll always be the most important thing in my life, second to none. I look forward to your article on Friday. I had fun thinking of you as I wrote this. <3

Romantic Epiphanies

me: XD It's ok. She wanted me to describe myself for her because I said she doesn't know who I am any more. And I couldn't think of anything. All the stuff that was coming to my mind was superficial. Likes, dislikes, hobbies. Nothing that really defined me. I'm not even sure that I have a me, just a consciousness and a disconnected body...

Sabrael: Your a strong woman, who loves helping others, but at the same time, wishes everyone would be willing to lend a helping hand without question when it is asked of them, the way you do. You don't want to be tied down to anything unless you are sure it is something you want in your life for as long as possible. You are beautiful, and brilliant, and even though you don't know it, your admired by the people that matter most. But in the end, it boils down to three words: You are Meg. And all that means is you are the person you are, and only a special handful can translate that in their heads, because your to great for words.

me: o^ ^o Romantic Epiphany
___

me: I love your voice. Accented or not. Silly voice or normal. When you're laughing, when you're distracted, when I know all you're thinking about is me, when you're nervous, when you've just woken up. I love it all.

Sabrael: o^ ^o Romantic Epiphany

If I bothered to do further research, I’m sure I’d find another term already coined for what Sab and I like to call, Romantic Epiphanies. Because it’s impossible that we are the first people who have tried to put this feeling into words.

For us, it’s almost always connected to words. One of us will say something to the other that’s almost a reminder of why we started on this relationship in the first place. I get that same giddy feeling that I had the first time he told me he loved me. My stomach flips around in my belly, I blush, and I can’t help but bring out my ‘Idiot Grin.’ And it doesn’t go away quickly either.

I always look forward to those moments, not only when I can receive those Romantic Epiphanies, but also give them. In a long distance relationship sometimes you feel like you can’t properly express yourself. When he says or does something that I appreciate, I can’t tackle glomp him, I can’t lean over and give him kisses. Sometimes I feel like the full effect of my love is lost somewhere in the distance between us when all I can respond with is a smile or a laugh. I treasure those moments when I can truly, unrestrainedly tell him how I feel and he just gets it. Somehow just knowing he understands means more to me than anything else could.

Love changes over time. This is a universal fact and an inevitability. And though change isn’t always bad (in fact, I would go so far as to say it rarely is) it can be unsettling and uncomfortable. Sometimes it’s just nice to be able to go back to the start and remember. All relationships start somewhere. Whether it’s out of a friendship, an undeniable attraction, a happy accident, a shared experience, or a commonality isn’t the point. The point is that there was a beginning and whatever it was, it should be remembered. I never want to forget how Sabrael first lured me in. Those beautiful, beautiful words. So until next time, let spell check know how much you appreciate her and have a great weekend.

P.S. I loved your article from Monday, Sab! It was so beautiful and the whole thing was simply full of Romantic Epiphanies. I also liked all the inside jokes you managed to subtly slip in there. I know this isn’t the first time I’ve said I had a hard week but I’m pretty sure this is the first time you’ve actually seen me have a meltdown. It wasn’t full implosion but I got close and you were beyond amazing the way you helped me through it. As always, thank you so much for being there for me and believing in me even when I don’t believe in myself. Especially then. Can’t say what I’d do without you, knowing what it’s like to have you. <3

Like A Thief in the Night: Stealing Words Away

First, allow me to apologize for my absence last Monday, I had gone away to Las Vegas to see my family for the holidays and the 5 hour bus rides took a bit out of me. But I digress, I hope everyone has a good weekend and let’s get to it shall we?

Words. Words are powerful. When spoken, intonation and body language lend them greater power than a dagger to the heart, or a greater joy than being able to kiss the lips of your one true love. Written, they are permanent, and their order, and choice of members, can mean the difference between being seen for what they are, or being misunderstood and causing an uproar. But words are neither good nor bad, simply the product of the thoughts of the speaking and writing. For me, my words are one of my biggest strengths. When speaking I tend to stammer if I get nervous: I pause, I stutter, and I often fail to pronounce the word I was looking for. But in writing my words are carefully chosen, and deftly positioned to impact the most. And my favorite target of these words? Why my lady love, Sorcha, of course. Leaving her speechless after a short note of love, or a simple observation of a new trait I noticed that I find infinitely adorable. That smile and the warm silence are my gifts in return for my words and I cherish them. Sorcha has begun to call these “Romantic Epiphanies” and I like to think we are coining a new term now (look for an article on Sorcha’s behalf explaining these very nice moments). Now, most people don’t know how to use their words, which, to me, seems like a shame, since it is a talent easily usable by many. You don’t need a big vocabulary, just the ability to not hide what your feeling, which seems like more of a problem with men than women. So here are 3 ways to be the Thief of the Night and escape with her words:

• Whispers. Whispers convey love and desire more so than a normal volume. When you get the chance, a kiss to the cheek, and whispered tender words. Something as simple as “I love you so much,” can send shivers down their spine. If your reply is a kiss, or simply a warm hug, it counts as a success. Care to push it further? Add context. Tell them one small thing you appreciate about them, be it physical, or emotional. Everyone likes hearing the reason why they are so desired, and if it’s something small that no one compliments, it tends to mean more. “My dearest Sorcha, I love you, and the way your smile always seems to call mine out from hiding.”
• Notes. Long letters sent to far off places, scribblings on a post-it note or a cute series of symbols on a white board attached to your refrigerator. Words written are almost eternal if preserved. And sometimes, they can mean more because of the thought put into them. When you wake up early, leave a post-it on your pillow or the lamp shade. Remind them of how much they mean to you, and how much you think of them. Write a letter, and even if you live together, drop it in your post, and let them find it, when you come home expect a nice hug in return. A scrap book, to put those post-its, letters, even Polaroids of the fridge every time those magnetic letters spell out a poem. Though if you run out of w’s, don’t be afraid to push those v’s close together.
• Song. This one people may wonder about, but it is true. Sending them a text of a song and artist, and letting them find it and hear it. It lets them know you always think of them when that romantic song comes on. As you may have seen, Sorcha and I have our own playlist in progress (here is a link to the first volume), but gathering song like this leads to a nice playlist of music you and your love can listen to together, and even sing along together. And regardless if you can sing or not, or you don’t think you are, singing them a love song while they fall asleep is always something that will make them smile.

So there you have it, three of many ways to use your words to steal theirs. Making them smile, hug you, kiss you or do something nonverbal. Even if they are just stunned, it is still a great compliment to be able to do that to them. So think those over, and until next time, give your Notepad a romantic epiphany and have a great week.

P.S. Sorcha my love, I am glad you understood about Monday, and I am glad to see both of us at our full again. I hope our filler hump is behind us and I hope to impress you with this article. I love you so much, and I can’t wait for our next special post. <3

Red String Nightmares, Part 2

(This is a continuation of an earlier article: Red String Nightmares, Part 1.)

The one time my life has ever remotely mirrored Hollywood, was that night. The typical nightmare sequence.

My eyes snapped open and every muscle in my body was tense as I snapped up. It took me a moment to realize I was panting heavily and my heart beat pounded in my ears. I gripped at the sheets as, in my confusion and darkness, I tried to remember where I was. Shakily I reached out a hand to flip on my lamp and the dark blue walls of my tiny room slowly came into focus. Sweat ran down my face and made me shiver as it was cooled by frigid blasts of the air conditioning.

I started to remember. Little snapshots of a faceless man with a large laughing mouth. He came at me with fingers like putty that only tangled around me the more I struggled. Silent screams poured from my mouth with no one to feel them. Before or since. I could feel the strength of his arms. Smell his sweat. See every pore on his face. It had felt so real and I was terrified. I needed to make it go away. I needed to stop seeing him behind my eyelids. I needed to tell someone. But who would be awake at 4:41 a.m. to answer my call?

I opened my laptop frantically, groping at straws that someone would be there to help me. And I did not hope in vain for there, when I signed in, was exactly the name I’d hoped for. Sabrael D. Carroll is online.

I told him, shared the whole dream. He didn’t tell me it was a silly fear, he didn’t tell me everything would be ok, he didn’t tell me to try and go back to sleep. He distracted me.

He filled my head with pictures of Autumn Arias, he told me secrets and plans, and we geeked out over role plays and cosplay ideas. It doesn’t seem like much and even looking back on the transcription of the conversation, it wasn’t much. But it was exactly what I needed. He was there for me and he helped me forget.

Sab and I both have problems with sleep. He has a tendency for insomnia and I for nightmares. That was the first time I called on Sab but it was not the last. It gives me more courage knowing I don’t have to face the night alone.

So until next time snuggle your webcams when they have bad dreams and have a great weekend!

P.S. I had a ton of fun working on the Thanksgiving post with you last week! I always like writing with you and can’t wait til we get to do it again. Don’t feel bad about missing Monday. There were buses and pies and volcanic coffees to distract you. I’m sure you’ll write a great on next week. Also thank you for taking care of me this week in my infirmities and being patient with my random lapses in consciousness. I love you dearest and I’m looking forward to spending a nice, relaxing weekend with you. <3