It’s a hard concept to explain to people because it’s a topic full of misconceptions. The most common being:
- He must be a total creeper or a 40-year-old pervert who will lure me to his house with candy so he can rape me.
- I’m only doing this for attention or just so I can say I have a boyfriend.
- We both are pathetic because we can’t find people in our own area who are interested in us.
- We don’t know anything about each other or are only seeing one side.
- (The one I hate the most) “You’ll get over it.”
This is part of the reason I wanted to start this blog. Now, in the digital age, statistics on how many couples meet online are shaky because of all the different venues it can occur in. However, most of the estimates are about 1 in 5 couples. That’s a huge amount of people! So why is no one fighting against all this bad press?
For me, personally, I don’t think I would have been able to find love without the internet. I don’t let people in very easily, especially not boys, and I have only a few close friends. All my past relationships failed because they got too close and I bolted. But more on this later, keep an eye out for my post next week.
But I digress, I’ve never been one of those people who does things just because everyone else does, and it always irritates me when people assume that I am. My hair has always been curly (even when it wasn’t fashionable), I love Harry Potter because it’s great literature (not because Daniel Radcliffe is ‘hott’), and I am obsessed with pirate history (not to be confused with obsession of Pirates of the Caribbean). So because of this stubborn streak of mine I was never that girl who always had to have a boyfriend. Truthfully I’ve only had three before and none of them lasted longer than a few months. Dating is serious to me. If I can’t see myself marrying the person then what is the point? If I just want to have fun I can hang out with my friends. That’s why past guys never stuck around long, I knew from the beginning it wasn’t going anywhere and it made me not want to try. Eventually I got tired of hurting people and just decided to stay away from relationships until I could find someone on equal footing with me. It took me a while but I’m glad I held out for him.
As for only seeing one side of the person, I will admit that to a point it’s true, I don’t know everything about Sabrael. We’ve been dating for two months, name one couple who knows everything about each other by that time. We’re still in the process of learning about each other and growing in our relationship but the thing that makes us different is that from the very beginning we promised to be completely honest with each other in everything. I know if I ask a question, no matter how personal or off the wall it is, he will answer me. Truthfully, I think that kind of trust is much more valuable than anything I could ever learn about him.
The whole point of this article is to let you know, that I’m not going to just get over it. I love Sabrael and even if this is a mistake it’s one I’m willing to make and one I’m willing to fight for my right to make. In this day and age it seems silly that people would judge the validity of a relationship based on something as arbitrary as proximity. With all the modes of communication available to use, face to face contact is often more of a luxury anyways. And what does that say about our society if the only relationships we value are ones with a constant physical component? With the detail of sex currently out of the picture I know Sab is not just dating me to use me, he’s dating me for me. I personally feel lucky to be able to know that. So those of you out there in internet relationships, it’s time for us to finally stand up for ourselves. Our feelings are just as important as anyone else’s we don’t need to be ashamed any more of who we love.
I have an internet boyfriend, I love him, and he means the world to me. Don’t like it? Get over it.
So, until next time, show some lovin' to those hot keys, and have a great weekend.
P.S. – Your last article was excellent, Sab. Quite honestly I think aside from the distance itself, the economics of our relationship have had the most strain on us. It’s always conversations about money and housing that wear us out. However, I believe in you! You’re a smart, talented, brilliant guy and you will find ways to make things work. I have absolutely no doubt about it. I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again. No matter how long it takes, I will be right here waiting for you. There is no rush because we have the rest of our lives to make up any lost time. I love you so much Sabrael!
